Patrick Bateman’s Guide to Manhattan Dining
Dining in fictional worlds part 1
By Haniya Khalid | September 23, 2023
American Psycho, the satirical novel by Bret Easton Ellis, is about many things you’re already familiar with. It’s a not-so-thinly veiled critique of Generation Jones yuppies, the increasingly consumerist culture of the late 1980s, the inescapable white powder that is progressively (disappointingly) diluted with laxatives. It’s about jealousy and insecurity disabling man’s search for identity. It’s about the profound emptiness of existential despair and the literal or figurative violence that inevitably spurs from the void
But at its heart, American Psycho is about food. Bateman chronicles in beautiful, luxurious detail, a desperate, even comically tearful urge to inject his vapid life with culture, meaning, and most importantly, flavor.
The endless bistros, delicatessens, and cafes — cuisines covering everything from Nouvelle Southwestern to California Classic — signify Bateman’s ultimately futile desire to feel full – and what a trip that is. In a way, the novel is what happens when you let every intrusive thought you’ve ever had run delightfully, wickedly rampant.
Ambitious, curious people are always looking for the energetic epicenter of things: to explore, deconstruct, understand, even control. Through Bateman’s endless hunger, Ellis asks an important question: what if you are already at the center, but ambition and curiosity burn through you anyway? Where do you look to, then?
During the production of Succession’s third season, Jeremy Strong requested a script rewrite. In a scene where Kendall Roy meets a reporter for lunch, he’s supposed to order a Waldorf salad. Strong changed this to a fennel salad with vinaigrette, insisting that a Waldorf salad is “something my dad would have ordered”. Waldorf salad – a sweet, mayonnaise-y salad consisting of grapes, green apples, walnuts, celery, and lettuce – was popular from the 30s to the 70s, taking a Jell-O-encased detour until its popularity eventually dwindled.
Food is fuel, sure, but what Strong astutely observes is that food tells us where we are in time and space. This leaves us with one question: does it also tell us who we are? According to Patrick Bateman, yes, it does, and that’s why he reserves his McDonald’s trips for when he’s alone, unobserved, and momentarily free.
Step into the novel (preferably in Ferragamo cap-toes) and let Bateman guide you on where to go and what to order. Dust off a copy of Zagat and try to find real-world alternatives to these incredible, somewhat ridiculous establishments. You never know — you might find yourself shaving black truffles over sliced fruit in a moment of panicked desperation to prove your social relevance.
PASTELS – Dinner
Patrick’s order
“I order, as an appetizer, the monkfish and squid ceviche with golden caviar”
“…the gravlax potpie with green tomatillo sauce”
Other orders
“Price orders with the tapas and then the venison with yogurt sauce and fiddlehead ferns with mango slices. McDermott orders the sashimi with goat cheese and then the smoked duck with endive and maple syrup. Van Patten has the scallop sausage and the grilled salmon with raspberry vinegar and guacamole.”
BARCADIA – Dinner
“…the tables are well-spaced, the lighting is dim and flattering, the food Nouvelle Southwestern…”
Patrick’s order
“For dinner I order the shad-roe ravioli with apple compote as an appetizer and the meat loaf with chevre and quail-stock sauce for an entrée”
Other orders
“She orders the red snapper with violets and pine nuts and for an appetizer a peanut butter soup with smoked duck and mashed squash which sounds strange but is actually quite good. New York magazine called it a ‘playful but mysterious little dish’ …”
DECK CHAIRS – Dinner
Description: “…exposed pipe and the columns and the open pizza kitchen and the… deck chairs…”
Cuisine: California classic cuisine, not to be confused with California cuisine, similar (maybe) to post-California cuisine.
Patrick’s order
“For an appetizer I order radicchio with some kind of free-range squid…”
Other orders
“Anne and Scott both had the monkfish ragout with violets…”
“Anne insisted that we all order some kind of blackened medium-rare redfish, a Deck Chairs specialty…”
PROPHETEERS – Lunch
{This restaurant is in Phoenix, not Manhattan}
Luis Carruther’s order
“I had the poached oysters, the lotte, and the walnut tart.”
Client & Client’s bimbo’s order
“The client had the boudin blanc, the roasted chicken, and the cheesecake.”
“She had the country salad, the scallops, and the lemon tart.”
BARCADIA – Dinner
Patrick’s order
“Dried peppers in a spicy pepper soup”
“I have the free-range rabbit with Oregon morels and herbed French fries…”
Other orders
“Dried corn and jalapeno pudding…”
“She ordered quail stuffed into blue corn tortillas garnished with oysters in potato skins…”
MCDONALDS – Late night snack
“Vanilla milkshake, extra-thick”
PATRICK’S APARTMENT – Breakfast
“I watched the huge Sony TV over a breakfast of sliced kiwi and Japanese apple-pear, Evian water, oat-bran muffins, soy milk and cinnamon granola…”
DUPLEX – Dinner
DESCRIPTION: “The new Tony McManus restaurant in Tribeca”
Orders
“..free-range chicken with raspberry vinegar and guacamole, calf’s liver with shad roe and leeks…”
VANITIES – Dinner
DESCRIPTION: “The new Evan Kiley bistro in Tribeca”
Patrick’s order
“…squid with pine nuts and can I have a slice of goat cheese…”
Other orders
“…ceviche with leeks and sorrel” “endive with walnut dressing”
ARCADIA – Dinner
Patrick’s order
“I decide on the pilot fish with tulips and cinnamon…”
Other orders
“I think the mahi-mahi,” she says and then, squinting at the menu, “with ginger.”
LUKE – Dinner
DESCRIPTION: “A new superchic nouevelle Chinese restaurant that also serves, oddly enough, Creole cuisine.”
Orders
“We order. The meal arrives. Typically, the plate is massive, white porcelain; two pieces of blackened yellowtail sashimi with ginger lie in the middle, surrounded by tiny dots of wasabi, which is circled by a miniscule amount of hijiki, and on top of the plate sits one lone baby prawn; another one, even smaller, lies curled on the bottom, which confuses me since I thought this was primarily a Chinese restaurant.”
PROGRESS – Dinner
“We order something called eagle carpaccio, mesquite-grilled mahi-mahi, endive with chevre and chocolate-covered almonds, this weird kind of gazpacho with raw chicken in it, dry beer.”
REGENCY – Breakfast
“Russell ordered for me while I was in the lobby on the phone. It was, unfortunately, a high-fat, high-sodium breakfast and before I could comprehend what was happening, plates of herbed waffles with ham in Madeira cream sauce, grilled sausages and sour cream coffee cake were set at our table and I had to ask the waiter for a pot of decaf herbal tea, a plate of sliced mango with blueberries and a bottle of Evian.
In the early morning light that poured through the windows at the Regency I watched as our waiter shaved black truffles gracefully over Lambert’s steaming eggs. Overcome, I broke down and demanded to have the black truffles shaved over my mango slices.”
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